NTC
by Selana46
Summary: [Story may change...I'm working on it] Batman, Nightcrawler, Kenshin crossover. Silly fic with a few original characters...Batman leaves Gotham in the hands of incapable 'replacements'. WW may show up, with some onesided BM and WW fluff.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: **I do not own any characters, except for Katie and Selana. They are my creations; they are my property. Don't steal them.

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**NTC**

**Chapter 1**

Bruce Wayne had never been told about a Wayne Enterprises convention on such short notice, and it was an out-of-town one, too. To make matters worse, he had no one to watch Gotham City while he was gone. Robin had gone out of town with Spoiler, Huntress and Batgirl wanted to go on a shopping spree in Metropolis, and Nightwing was busy in Blüdhaven. So he was forced to resort to other people. Rookies, yes, but they'd have to keep Gotham safe for at _least_ a few nights…

We find our hero and his two 'trainees' in the Batcave. Batman, with what little time he had, was trying to teach the newbies the basics of being a superhero in Gotham City. "This," he said, indicating the computer's large screen, "is the Joker and Harley Quinn." There was a moment of silence before he continued. "They are one of the most threatening couples in Gotham. Any questions?"

Both of the superheroes-in-the-making shook their heads as they studied the picture on the screen. "Are you two even listening to me?"

Once again, both only nodded as they stared at the screen. Finally, The Dark Knight's least favorite of the two made eye contact with him. "Cut to the goods, Bats. Are there any _single_ villainesses?"

Batman glared at him. "There is no way you are going to 'charm' any of the villains in this city, Kurt. That isn't what I brought you here for."

Kurt shrugged. "I know. I was just thinking…maybe Kenshin and I could persuade them to switch sides, you know?" He smiled slightly and looked back at the screen.

Batman typed something on the keyboard, and a new picture showed up. "This is Joker and Harley's daughter, Selana Satine Quinn. She is the worst threat to Gotham City. You cannot, under any circumstances, fall for any of her tricks. Got it?"

"What kind of tricks, Batman?" Kurt asked, staring wide-eyed at the picture on the screen. The woman was wearing a tight leather cat suit, the zipper in front only half-zipped.

"Ones you don't want to get involved in." With a glance at Kenshin, he added, "Neither of you should go anywhere near her or her partner. Her name is Katie." Yet another picture appeared on the screen, this one of a different woman. She was wearing a similar outfit, but it was a two-piece instead of a cat suit.

"But what if they commit a crime?" Kenshin asked, speaking up for the first time since they'd gone into the Batcave.

Batman sighed. "If you see either of them, steer clear."

"How can we possibly keep Gotham City safe if we're avoiding its biggest threat?"

With a glance at his Batwatch, Batman stood up. "You two are going to have to figure that out for yourselves. I need to leave or I'll be late for the plane." The Dark Knight hurriedly walked towards the door, starting to take off his cowl.

"Fine! If Gotham City is in ruins when you get back, that's not our fault!" Kurt yelled after him. "Right, Kenshin?…Kenshin?" He looked down at his red-haired friend. "You alive in there?"

Kenshin might as well have been dead. He was too busy staring at the picture of Katie. Finally he glanced up at Kurt. "Is there a 'print' button on this?"

"C'mon, Katie! The Bat is leavin' tonight! Ready for an evening of mischief!" Selana yelled, standing in the doorway of their hideout.

"Just a second!" came the answer. "I can't find my top!"

"How many times do I have to tell you, Kats?" Selana mumbled as she leaned against the doorframe. "The guys go for the one-piece…"

Just then Katie burst out of her room, zipping up her top. "Ok! I'm ready! Where're we goin', anyways?"

Selana smirked. "Well, I was thinkin' we could go spend that money we stole last night. Ya know, maybe on some nice clothes or somethin' like that. Maybe mess around with the people who are keepin' Gotham safe while Bats is gone. Um…mess with their heads, I mean."

Katie smiled and nodded. "Maybe we should get a car, first. Makes transportation a lot easier."

"Yeah! And _then_ we can hit Gotham City Bank! And then we can go to Gotham City Mall! And then we can terrorize Wayne Manor!" Selana frowned for a second. "Wait…maybe we should—"

"Forget about that! We get to do _whatever_ we want tonight. Let's not let it go to waste, Sel!" Katie grabbed Selana's arm and started to drag her out the door.

"Wait, Kats! I forgot my gun!" Selana darted into her room and was back out in a matter of seconds, sticking her gun in her belt. "Now I'm good. First stop: Gotham Car Dealers!"

After they'd gotten out of the crime parts of Gotham City, and it was nearly midnight, Katie stopped Selana. "Hey, Sel, I was just thinking…what if Batman's replacements are really, _really _hot? Then can we mess around with more than just their heads?"

Selana gave Katie a shocked but equally interested look. "Katie! I can't believe it! You of all people are suggesting that we fool Batman's rookies into sleeping with us! That's an extremely naughty thing to do! And if there's only one of them, that means that only one of us gets to have fun. So no. We can't do anything like that. And we have to solemnly swear that we will never do anything of the sort with any of Batman's replacements as long as we are villainesses. Even if they _are_ hotter than all Hell, there is no way we will _ever_ get close to _anyone_ who works for Batman. Do you swear?"

"Um…don't we need something to swear on, first?"

Selana looked around for a moment, then picked up a crumpled up piece of paper off the street. "Do you swear on this piece of trash that you will never mess around with any guys that work for Batman, even if they are one of the hottest men you've ever seen?"

Katie shrugged and put her hand on the paper. "Sure, why not?"

"Ok! Now we getta find out what's on the paper…just out of curiosity, ya know?" Selana straightened out the paper and started to read. Once she was done she threw the paper in a trashcan that was close by. "Stupid guys and their love poems…"

"Let's get back to what we were doing, then." Katie started walking again. Selana caught up to her friend and stopped her.

"Hold on, Kats. First, we need ammo. I've got a gun, but you have no protection whatsoever." With a smile, Selana pointed to a gun shop across the street. "That place should be perfect!"

"Wait a sec, Sel. Haven't we stolen from there before? Won't it be kinda suspicious if we do it again?"

Selana shook her head. "No one'll ever catch us anyways. And if they have a new security system…all the better to meet Batty's replacements, right?" she added with a smirk.

Katie smiled back. "Gotcha! And maybe you can get a new gun, too…"

"Are you crazy! I'll neva give up my baby." Selana stroked the handle of her gun lovingly.

"I can always try…" Katie mumbled.

"Hey, Kurt! This one thinks he sees the Bat Signal!" Kenshin yelled as he stared at the light-generated picture in the sky.

"How can you tell?" Kurt called back as he ran up the stairs. "I thought you were too busy staring at that picture!" Kenshin rolled his eyes as Kurt glanced out the window. "_Ja_, that's it." He turned to go back down into the Batcave.

"Wait. What if it's those girls? Katie and…"

"Selana? I was thinking the same thing. We'd better just go and find out, _mein freund._ We aren't going to do much crime fighting if we're cowering here every time we see the Bat Signal in the sky. Anyways, since when did we listen to Bats? I don't think he actually expected us to stay away from them, either," Kurt smirked as he went back down the stairs. "C'mon, Kenshin! If we don't hurry, we'll miss all the action."

Kenshin rolled his eyes a second time as he followed Kurt down the stairs and behind the grandfather clock to the Batcave. Even though he _would_ enjoy seeing Katie in person rather than looking at that picture of her and forming his own fantasies in his mind; he could tell that they were headed towards plenty of trouble, and he wanted to stay out of it.

By the time he got into the Batcave, Kurt was already in the driver's seat of the Batmobile. "You know, I'm thinking we should take the Batwing. An aerial attack would probably go a lot smoother."

Kenshin gave him a puzzled look. "You can drive it?"

"What do you mean? 'Course I can! They didn't teach me how to drive the Blackbird for nothing." Kurt got out of the Batmobile and looked around for a moment. "Do you see the Batwing anywhere?"

Kenshin shook his head. "Perhaps Batman did not want us to use it."

Kurt sighed. "It's just like I said before, Kenshin. He told us to stay away from those two girls, but he didn't actually mean it. It was just a warning to be careful around them. And we can't find the Batwing because he just wants us to be safe instead of driving it like madmen. Get it?"

"This one will never understand you…" Kenshin muttered as he shook his head helplessly.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

"Oohh…I like this one. It's nice and shiny." Katie picked up a gun from a broken display case, looking over it with careful eyes while ignoring the alarm blaring nonstop in the background.

"Don't worry about that," Selana said from behind her. "It'll get dull eventually."

"NO! I want a gun that will _never_ get old and dull."

"Well if you polish it every day like I do mine, I'm sure it'll stay that shiny for you, Sparkle Girl." Selana rolled her eyes.

"Great! I'll take it."

"Now off to get ourselves a car…"

"Wait, Sel," Katie said, grabbing her friend's arm. "Inspiration just struck. How about we just go straight to Wayne Manor and steal the Batmobile? Or at least a Mustang from his garage…"

"Kats, you are my favorite partner." Selana said with a smile on her face.

Just then, they both heard the screech of car wheels going _way_ too fast around a turn.

"What's that?" Katie asked.

"I…think…they found us. Maybe they aren't amateurs, after all." Selana went to the front door, opened it, and looked outside. After a second she had closed the door and locked it. "We don't have much time to scram."

"Where do we go!" Katie exclaimed, obviously panicked.

"I guess the best way would be through the roof," Selana answered in the calmest voice she could.

"Selana. You and I both know very well that I am not capable of flying. And neither are you!" Katie said, hands on her hips in an angry fashion.

"That's not what I meant! There have to be some stairs or something to get to the roof. We gotta find 'em!"

"I have another idea!" Katie exclaimed.

Selana glared at her. "Oh, always the thinker, are we?"

"I'm serious, Sel! We can go out the back..."

"And go around to the front…"

"And steal the Batmobile…"

"And wreak more havoc on the city! But like I said, we gotta hurry…" Selana sprinted to the back of the store, Katie close behind.

Both villainesses burst out the back door just as the front door was broken down. But neither girl stopped to look back. Instead, they went around the store to the front, stifling laughter when they saw the Batmobile parked half on the curb, both doors wide open and the engine on. Selana mouthed to Katie that she would take the driver's seat for now; she'd stolen it before with Joker when she was younger and knew how to drive it. They got in the Batmobile, shut the doors as quietly as they could, and got their seat belts on.

"Get ready, Kats," Selana whispered as she put her foot on the gas pedal, but didn't push down.

"I'm ready, I'm ready!" Katie whispered back excitedly. "Just hurry up! You said we didn't have much time."

"All right, I'm gettin' there! Keep your pants on." Selana put her hands on the steering wheel and slammed her foot on the gas pedal.

"…um…Sel? I don't hear the screeching of wheels…" Katie said slowly after a few moments.

"Well…we just haven't gone around any turns yet."

"We're not even moving."

"How dare you say that! My foot's on the gas pedal, right? The keys are in the ignition, right? We're prob'ly just going so fast we can't tell," Selana said with more than a hint of nervousness.

"Selana, face it. We've just been outsmarted. It's probably a phony set of keys."

Just then, the roof of the Batmobile went up and back, revealing the night sky. And two very proud-looking vigilantes. "That's right. Only these keys will actually work the Batmobile," one of them said, holding up a key chain with almost a dozen keys attached.

"Should have known," Selana said slowly, "Those have Bat symbols on them…" Selana was kind of scared of Batman's temporary replacements. The one that spoke had a German accent, which sent shivers up her spine, and she could barely see anything of him but a dark outline and two glowing yellow eyes. She could see that he had a tail or something, and he only had three fingers; he was probably a meta. The other one had long red hair—maybe he was a hippie?—and a sword at his side. He wore a baggy shirt and pants, making him look pretty feminine—maybe he was…gay?—and he had scars on his face. But that wasn't going to stop her from getting what she wanted.

"Is there a reason you stole my car keys?" Selana asked in the most innocent voice she could.

"Wait a second. _Your_ car keys? You must be mistaken, _fraulein_; this car belongs to the Batman."

"_You_ must be the mistaken ones. See, we're close friends of Batman's, and we have permission to commandeer this vehicle. Right, Katie?"

The red-haired dude spoke up. "Katie?" he asked quietly, staring at her, then got down on one knee. "Will you marry me?"

Katie stared right back with a confused expression on her face. "Well…I'm flattered and all—"

Before she could finish, Selana had snatched the keys out of the German one's hand with expert criminal skill and had thrown out the phony keys, replacing them with the right ones. "Like I said, boys, we got a tight schedule to keep to, and we really must be going. Catch you for coffee later or something, right? Right." She turned on the engine and slammed on the gas pedal. They were gone in less than a second.

"Hey, Sel? Is it just me or did that seem _really_ easy?" Katie asked after they had been cruising around Gotham for a few minutes.

Selana didn't answer at first; she was busy trying to avoid the cars that were too slow for her taste. Unfortunately for them, she gave up trying to pass them and just let them get hit by the Batmobile. If it got scratched up…it wasn't their problem. "Of course it was easy, Kats! They're rookies. And anyways…I think they're gay."

Katie looked shocked. "Why do you say that?"

"Didja see what RHSD was wearing? He's so gay!"

"RHSD?"

Selana shrugged. "Since we don't know their names, I decided to name them for our benefit. The creepy dude wearing spandex is Mutated Kittie, and the other dude is Red-Haired Sword-Dude. So thus, they are MK and RHSD."

"Oh. Well, I don't think so. I mean…sure he looks it, but in case you missed, he kinda proposed to me. And _I_ don't think I look manly."

Selana looked Katie up and down for a moment. "No, ya don't. So that means MK is the feminine one." Selana shuddered. "Metas creep me out."

Katie nodded. "Me too! Let's avoid them until Batman gets back!"

"That could be kinda hard…we _did_ steal their transportation, and I bet they're just itching to get it back…"

"I _can't _believe we were just outsmarted by those girls!"

"'We'?" Kenshin smiled. "This one believes it was _you_ who gave the keys away."

Kurt glared at Kenshin. "I didn't give them away. I was distracted when you proposed to Katie. Man, it's cold out here. How're we gonna get back to Wayne Manor?"

"We could flag down a taxi."

"Looking like this? No way. I say we just walk and hope we get back before sunrise. Or we could phone Alfred and ask him to pick us up." Kurt looked around for a pay phone. "You got any cash?"

"No." Kenshin sighed. "We'd better start walking if we want to get back before the night is over."

When Katie and Selana finally arrived home after a night of driving like madwomen all over Gotham, they both agreed that life was a lot better when Batman was gone. Selana had never stolen the Batmobile without her father or mother's help, and Katie had never gotten very close to it period.

"Hey, Kats, we need a good team name. Like Bats and Robin are the Dynamic Duo. We should have something like that to sound professional. No, no, it's the other way! Wax on, wax off." Since Katie had a new gun, Selana was showing her how to properly take care of one.

"How about the Devilish Duo? Or…E.V.I.L.?"

"A lot of villains are evil."

"I know! But I mean like off of Spongebob. Every Villain Is Lemons? Ya know?" Katie quickly flipped her gun over to start on the other side.

"Oh. But people will get that screwed up with regular normal evil. We gotta have something that jumps out and bites ya in the butt." Selana sighed and sat down in a chair next to Katie's, starting to polish her own gun so that she didn't have to waste valuable time doing it during the day.

"I think that Selana and Katie is threatening enough."

"But people hear that and think that we're pansies or something."

Katie looked up from her work for a moment, biting her lower lip as she thought. "Maybe we should ask Suda for a title."

Selana smiled mischievously. "What are we waiting for? Let's go!"

For the many of you readers who do not know, Allison Suda a.k.a. Sudafed the Great is a legendary Prophesier or Seer who is extremely wise, can occasionally see the future, and is able to look at other people's memories. Though she grew up honoring Batman, she has chosen to side with her friends. No one in the Bat clan really knows about her because she only helps out Katie and Selana; she doesn't actually do any villainous things.

Selana knocked on the door, wishing Suda would answer a little quicker because it was actually pretty darn cold for Gotham City that night. Katie stood beside her, staring in wonder at the door—she'd never actually _been_ to Sudafed's house. To her, it was the greatest thing that had happened since she'd been carefully chosen to be Selana's partner in crime.

Finally the door opened a crack and they both heard someone ask, "Who's there?"

Selana grinned. "Ya know it's me, Suda! No one else has the guts to wake ya up this early!"

The door opened all the way and a half-asleep Allison waved them in.

After they had gotten inside and Selana and Katie explained why they had come, Suda insisted that there was no way she could help unless she was awake. So, she went about making herself and her guests coffee, eating a quick breakfast, taking a cold shower, and changing out of her pajamas before she sat before them with a bright smile on her face. "So, how can I help my favorite criminals?"

"We need a good title. I don't think I have to explain it; you always seem to know what I mean anyways."

Allison thought for a moment. "First of all, what makes you think you actually need one?"

Katie smiled slightly. "That's what I said…"

"Secondly, you're taking this pretty seriously considering the fact that you don't take _anything_ seriously. Trying to impress someone, are we?"

"No!" Selana held out her hand. "Here, look! You can see for yourself who's keeping Gotham safe while the Bat is gone."

Katie nodded enthusiastically and held her hand out, too. Sudafed took both of their hands, sighing as she did so. "I only just woke up, you two. And this _is_ something I just learned how to do a few months ago."

"Aw, c'mon. It was just a few minutes that we saw them. Sel drove off before I could get a real good look at RHSD."

Allison gave her a strange look. "Well, I guess I'll find out when I see." She closed her eyes. "Now remember back to when you saw them. Don't fidget so much, you two. That makes it a lot harder."

Katie and Selana both closed their eyes, thinking back to when they had met MK and RHSD earlier that night. Selana was used to doing this; Suda was mildly obsessed with Batman and she liked to watch Selana's run-ins with him after it had taken place. But since this was all new to Katie, it was a little harder for her to take hold of a memory and think of only that. Her short attention span didn't help much, either.

But, despite that, Sudafed was done in a few short minutes. She let go of Selana and Katie's hands, opened her eyes, and sat for what seemed like forever thinking in silence.

Finally, Katie spoke up. "So, what do you think?"

Allison smiled slightly. "Well…all I can think to say is…don't ya want to know their _real_ names? I mean, MK and RHSD? Isn't that kinda low?"

Selana smiled back. "To the first question: No. To the second question: Of course, why not? And to the third question: No! People give each other nicknames all the time. We don't call you Sudafed for nothin'!"

Suda's smile faded. "I know, I know. I bet you'll find out what their real names are someday. In fact, I'm a hundred percent sure of it."

Katie finally spoke up. "Wow! That's amazing! How can you do that?"

"Well, it's common sense, really. I mean, you're gonna be seeing these guys almost every night for at least a few days, and young men like that are _bound_ to be attracted to you, so it's pretty inevitable that they'll tell you their names. And you might even get a free phone number or address thrown in."

"That is so cool! I wish I were that smart!" Katie's eyes were wide with amazement now.

"You have the potential, you know. You just have to use you're head like I do, and—"

"Oh, no you don't!" Selana butted in. "I'm not gonna let you ruin my perfectly good partner. If Kats starts thinkin' straight like you, she might become obsessed with Batman like you did. And I'm not ready to go solo again!"

"Are you saying that Sudafed the Great used to be your partner?" Katie asked.

"See? Not even an _hour_ with you and she's figurin' out stuff like that!"

"Don't worry, Sel. I don't think _anyone_ can help Katie."

Katie stared at Allison for a moment. "Was that an insult?"

Suda laughed. "See what I mean?"

"I think that's the cue that we should get goin'. Anyways, it looked like there were gonna be early morning showers and I don't want the Batmobile to get rusted or anything." Selana said, standing up and motioning for Katie to follow her lead.

"All right, I guess I'll let you leave. There's something else I wanted to tell you, though. Tonight, Wonder Woman is going to Wayne Manor to look for Bats. I guess he forgot to tell the JL that he would be gone. And I know you've _always_ wanted her lasso, Sel. Good luck getting it."

Selana smirked. "Thanks for the info, Suda. Next time you see me, I _will_ have that lasso on my belt. And I'll give Katie that tiara, too. The Amazon Princess will fall! And I'd love to see Batsy's face when he gets back and finds out…"


End file.
